Pegging is still a little bit of a mystery to some people, but it really shouldn’t be.
Do you know G-spot orgasms?
Those deep, internal, wonderful explosive orgasms that sometimes bang on for aaaages?
Yeah, well, guys and people with penises have a G-spot, too (aka the prostate), and stimulating it can produce some pretty mind-blowing sensations – and orgasms.
There are a lot of ways to try prostate play, whether that’s by using beginner’s anal toys or manual fingering, but there’s also pegging and
if you’re both into it, it is so SO great.
What is Pegging?
Pegging is when a woman wears a strap-on dildo and penetrates her partner anally.
Usually, pegging is often reserved to describe the act between heterosexual couples, so it’s a woman flipping the traditional gender
dynamic and “fucking” the man.
But there are tons of lesbians out there who also never leave for a date without their strap-on in their bag so that they can penetrate their partners both vaginally and anally.
And do you know what?
Although it feels a bit intimidating and scary at first, being in charge of the thrusting (and taking control) can be super hot.
But really, anyone can peg or be pegged. It’s an equal opportunity sex act.
12 Things To Know When Pegging
- In order to pleasure your partner’s prostate, you need to know where it is.
This kidney-bean-sized gland is located inside the anus about two to three inches in on the front side of the body.
It is about one inch in diameter but, during arousal, it swells and becomes firmer (making it easier to find).
Like the vaginal G-spot, the prostate responds to gentle but firm pressure, massage, and a come-hither motion.
This is the gland that’s responsible for squeezing out prostatic fluid, a component of semen.
So, during ejaculation, you can actually feel it flutter. - You are not a porn star
Porn performers are well-practiced at anal play and the scenes you see
Are only the most exciting (and, um, explosive) part of a much longer process.
Take things slow and steady.
The anus is a very sensitive area.
That’s what makes the anal play so pleasurable.
But it’s also why you need to be patient and let your partner guide the experience – and how far you take it.
- Using a penis takes practice
So, when you strap one on for the first time, expect to look and feel a little awkward and silly.
Wearing a strap-on is a new experience.
So, I recommend that you practice wearing it and moving with it by yourself first.
As for the motion used during pegging, I recommend that the giver steers clear of their natural inclination toward rotating their hips and focus strictly on thrusting in and out.
It’s all about the butt and core strength.
- Supplies
In order to give pegging a try, you’ll need a harness and dildo.
I personally recommend fabric harnesses
Because, unlike leather, they can be properly cleaned and sanitized in the washing machine.
Lovehoney does a great harness and dildo set – it comes with two different sized silicone dildos so you can work your way up.
- Hygiene
With anal play, we need to be more careful about hygiene.
You should also consider laying out a towel and covering hands or fingers that are going into or around the anal area with gloves. This will help keep your hands clean and minimize cleanup later.
- Lube is your BFF
If there is one thing you absolutely can’t forget when it comes to pegging or any type of anal play, it’s to use lube.
Unlike the vagina, the anus is not self-lubricating.
So in order to avoid friction and pain and ensure pleasure, you need to keep things slippery.
I recommend a high-quality silicone-based lubricant for the smoothest ride.
Bear in mind, silicone lube cannot be used with silicone sex toys,
So if the dildo you’re using is silicone, opt for a water-based lube.
- The receiver should experiment on themselves first
Determining what you like when it comes to anal play is personal.
It’s a good idea if you take your own, personal anal adventure first.
Trying using your finger when you are in the shower or try the low tier balls on an anal bead string. - Don’t start with the ass
Have you ever had someone penetrate you before you weren’t quite ready? It’s traumatic, right?
Penetration of any kind requires adequate arousal (and your partner’s OK!).
This is part of the reason why pegging is such a great role reversal;
The receiver will truly understand what it’s like to be the one on the receiving end,
And the giver might learn that patience, in the heat of the moment, isn’t so easy for anyone.
So, before you go anywhere near the butt, get your partner turned on first.
- Communication
There’s no way for you to know how your partner feels unless you communicate.
Make sure your partner is ready.
Make sure they know what you’re doing before you do it and check in with them to see how it’s going.
- Everybody Wins
Pegging isn’t just fun for the partner who’s being pegged, or it doesn’t have to be.
A well-fitting harness and a toy that grinds you in just the right spot (ie. the clitoris), can be very pleasurable.
I recommend finding a quality harness that fits well and harnesses your toy tight against your body.
The better the harness fit, the more organic signals you will be able to feel from your partner. - Not Gay
One common fear about pegging – for both partners, regardless of whether they’re giving or receiving,
Is that wanting to receive anal pleasure means your partner will want anal sex with a real live penis.
But while this fear certainly is common, it’s totally off-base.
Who you want to have sex with – that’s your sexual orientation.
What feels good to you – that’s your body and nerve endings.
The two are not related - Build a tighter connection
Pegging can be fun, sexy, and a little kinky.
But it can also improve the level of connection and empathy between you and your partner.
A lot of men say that now that they’ve been on the receiving end, they understand how women can be turned on.
I had a girlfriend that said, “Wow, now I understand why my boyfriend gets excited and starts going faster – I did the same thing!”
Your partner may or may not be into pegging,
But the mere act of asking could lead to a better conversation about what they do want.
Like, maybe he’s not okay with a strap on but is totally into trying a prostate massage with your fingers.
Or literally anything else you two might want to try together.
If you do decide to try pegging and are in a relationship with someone who’s down,
Taking a trip to the sex shop to pick out a strap on and lube together is a super fun bonding activity.
nice 😍