Have you had a massage lately?
Sex is more than just, well, sex.
There’s no definite how-to, and it’s more than just intercourse.
In fact, “outercourse” is the new flirtatious foreplay we should be experimenting with.
As a woman (who’s a little bit difficult to please), sex can feel like a dance to me,
and sometimes it’s hard to find a good dance partner.
It involves touching, feeling, and being emotionally vulnerable.
And when it comes to touching and feeling, acupressure can help.
There are techniques and points that can jumpstart that safe and nurturing environment and, in turn, help maximize pleasure.
Touching is a powerful thing, especially in areas other than our genitals.
The act of physically touching your partner helps create intimacy and relieve stress.
This means, in the bigger picture of many sexual dysfunctions, touch could help dissolve mental or emotional blockages.
Especially for women who feel expected to live up to or act out certain expectations.
But ultimately, stress affects both sexes and is often what is keeping us from having more fun in the bedroom.
What is acupressure?
Acupressure is a form of alternative therapy in which manual pressure is used to stimulate
specific points on the body along what are considered to be lines of energy.
Like acupuncture, which uses tiny needles, acupressure stimulates the body at certain meridians or pressure points.
Getting rid of the psychological barriers to awesome sex
To help create a peaceful atmosphere, I suggest beginning with a scalp massage,
pressing the pads of your fingers in circular motions on the scalp, and then moving down to the neck.
What it is that you are trying to do is to go to the highest and lowest pressure points on the body,
the furthest points from the core, the furthest points from where balance derives,
as a way of creating safe, nurturing, and calming energy.
From the acu-perspective, this is an effective way of balancing the yin and yang extremes in the body.
When doing this, and any form of intimate touch, it’s important to approach without expectations, but with plenty of care and caution.
Here are the acupressure points and areas that you and your partner can test out to soothe your body, promote trust, and potentially up
5 Areas To Massage To Ramp Up Your Sex Life
- Head Massage
Focus on the DU20.
The DU20 is at the top of the head above the ears.
The DU20 is one of the most active areas of the body, massaging these areas actually helps lower this activity out of the head and back to the core of the body.
With our frantic, productivity-driven lives, we often invest too much of our body’s resources in our brains and this can get in the way of foreplay.
Massaging DU20 and the head, in general, helps to calm an overtaxed mind and allows that precious blood to flow in a more balanced way in the body.
- Foot Massage
Bottom of the foot, about a third of the way down (K11); inside the foot, at the base of the toe (SP4).
Gently rub Kidney 1 (KI1) and Spleen 4 (SP4), which are both located on the feet.
These are considered very powerful points for balancing the subtle energies in the body while simultaneously promoting an increase in blood flow to the core of the body.
Both of these points are directly and intimately connected to both the male and female reproductive organs.
- Calf massage, using KI7 and SP6
Inside the calves, two fingers above the ankle.
Kidney 7 (KI7) is thought to promote the yang, warming energy in the body.
Spleen 6 (SP6) is said to promote the yin, calming energy in the body.
These are closely associated, promoting healthy blood flow which is no surprise as healthy blood flow and arousal certainly go hand in hand.
- Belly rub, focusing on Ren6
Two-finger spaces down from the belly button.
Belly points can be very tender and since they’re located closer to our reproductive organs and the parts we use in sex,
massaging these points should be done with a bit of caution and extra care.
Since it’s also located on the most calming point of all acupuncture channels, it makes a wonderfully balanced point.
So massage with care as it can help to nurture a sense of intimacy and arousal all at once.
A small spot, above the crotch where the hip hinges and meets the body.
Stomach 30 (ST30) is right near the main artery (pudendal nerve ), which again, helps to increase blood flow in the body.
Slowly press on this pressure point for a few seconds, hold, and release.
For best results, hold eye contact with your partner during this intimate routine.
The Pudendal Nerve runs from your lower back, along your pelvic floor muscles, out to your perineum
(the skin between your pubic bone and your tailbone).
I m sure there are more places we could massage but these helpful points are chosen for their capacity to calm,
which makes for more sensitive and considerate foreplay and more aroused and exciting intercourse.
It’s important to be caring and gentle and gently rub or massage these points with love, like a soft kiss, and not harsh pressure.
In general, when it comes to acupressure, each individual requires their own unique treatment.
Creating arousal spaces
Above all else, try to create a calm space for you and your partner.
Almost all arousal issues are psychological, not physical.
Since our current society praises hectic busyness and stress, our bodies and minds never have a moment to be bored.
But boredom is actually essential to our human existence.
By focusing on certain yin, or calming, pressure points can “force boredom” on the body and tune out of all of life’s craziness.
Plus, this is the basis upon which any increase in real sex drive can occur, as opposed to artificial increase from drugs or porn.
By forcing boredom onto the body, people will settle into a more relaxed state so they’re mentally and physically available for intimacy.
Everybody is different, and the most important aspects of improving your sex life come from within.
Communication, trust, and relaxation are key.
Furthermore, there’s no golden standard for the pleasure of sex.
These pressure points will help increase calmness and reduce stress, which can lead to increased pleasure and communication during sex.
I’d also like to suggest that you don’t use these points solely for sexual pleasure.
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